Why people don’t heal: No 4


In my previous articles titled «Why people don’t heal and how they can» – Part One through Three, I mentioned 8 of the reasons why people don’t heal. If you haven’t read these reasons, please refer to our previous articles.

«Perception & Awareness». The 9th & 10th reasons why people are not cured

In the summer of 2010, I found myself in a series of scenarios that ended up revealing the «true image» of people in my circle. The experience was so great that I called it «the feast of illusions”. As the «masks» fell, I discovered behind their psyche to be completely different from the one projected.

Why did all these people «happen» to reveal themselves to me at the same time? Which aspect of my character did they want to mirror?

I struggled to understand the correlation that this had in my life. Nο matter how hard I tried to understand, I could not find the reasons and my search seemed completely in vain.

In August of the same year, I traveled to the United States for a series of seminars about the Spiritual Response and Restructuring Therapies (SRT & SpR). I had the honor not only to be trained and certified as an SpR teacher by Robert Detzler, founder of these therapies, but also to spend time with him. There, I had the opportunity to answer many of the questions I had concerning my spiritual path and my articles on «Why people don’t heal…».

He made a very to-the-point comment about the effectiveness of healings in general, which was: «All healings help people to the extent that they are willing to face their truth». Suddenly, various answers began to clarify inside me.

When I was living with manic depression, I made sure to «get out» of my shell only when I was well. When people asked me where I had been for so many months, I replied with a laugh, «I had my blues». At one point, after a seemingly big event, I cried non-stop for 3 days. Then and for the first time, I did what I avoided for years, I met a friend when I had my blues. Of course, I had to tell her why I was feeling so bad. When I explained what I was going through, she looked at me stoically and as a trained nurse, she said «You need help. You can’t cry for three days for something like that. What you are going through is excessive». And so my healing journey began.

Months later, after I had received help and I was «on track», I was talking to one of my first cousins ​​about this. She replied: «I can’t believe that this sunny girl I know, who inspires and finds solutions for everyone, was so tragically immersed in grief. It’s not that I don’t believe in you, but I can never imagine you like that».

It was painful to hear this. I’ve heard similar answers from others, relatives or not, when I revealed my truth to them. They responded with almost the same exact words and then acted as if I had NEVER said it. They never called to see how I was doing or if I needed anything and never asked me about it again. Since then, they never referred to it, not even in casual conversation. I felt, as if I was really alone.

After three-four years I managed to overcome my problem and function calmly and without pills. I managed initially with the help of classical medicine and a bit later with the SRT & SpR methods and a lot of acceptance, forgiveness and a constant effort for self-awareness. Afterward, I could overcome difficult situations in a relatively easy manner and realize many of my dreams, without feeling that I had to «sweat blood for every dream».

When I heard Robert Detzler speak about «facing our truth» it became clear to me that, while I was hiding my true situation and wore the mask of «sunshine and joy», I essentially didn’t allow others to see my reality. When events and the flow of life forced this mask to fall, people did not respond with what I considered «proper» willingness to help me.

But who is responsible for this image I created? Why do people have to respond to my «deeper situation» when I was playing my part so well in projecting a «pleasant» lie? I didn’t do it to deceive others or to get things from them, material or otherwise. That would be deception. I did it out of pride, of course. Not to seem «like this, but somewhat different».

When I was ready to «see my truth» and drop my mask, I found along the way other people’s mask that life forced them to drop. Therefore, we were all invited to the «feast of illusions».

Certainly, you know people who seem «a certain way» but with the first sign of «trouble» you discover that they were hiding behind their own finger? What do you feel for them? Do you respect them? Do you feel pity, contempt or anger because they hid the truth from you?

When we hide our own truth from ourselves, in essence, we have no perception or awareness of our reality, two very necessary elements in healing and the first steps of change. In order to change, you must first accept that there is a problem or issue that needs correction. Our perception of our real situation will mobilize us towards the next step. And these steps of change will ultimately bring us the awareness of why we are where we are.

But this is for another of our articles.

Xenia Ioannidou
Teacher & Consultant of Alternative Therapies
Founder of GrecoDow® Educational Systems